LIFE… we don’t know how it will go or end, or do we? Living this LIFE of ours can be such an adventure.  As we make choices our directions can drastically change, sometimes overnight and where we were once headed is no longer an option along our paths.  We close one door but as we do, we’ve opened up another one.

There was a time I flirted with the idea of living in the US for the duration of my life.  Coming back ‘home’ wasn’t even appealing to me.  I believed that everything I wanted to create in life had to be created in the US.  After living there for years I felt I had become too ‘americanized’ to ever be able to come back to a small island in the Atlantic Ocean.  The very idea felt confining and limiting and I guess it ‘scared’ me.  Which was all the more reason to come back ‘home’ and face myself at the very core of my being.  I had ripped myself up from my roots and planted myself in new soil and found I thrived very well and even blossomed in the dry and tough soil of the Arizona desert.  All my BIG dreams seemed to be focused around my new ‘home’ but after having recurrent dreams about the ocean I knew my soul was calling for it’s real home.  All changes start with desire and I began longing for the fresh ocean breeze and the world’s purest water.  Not long after that a dialogue started taking place, and my husband and I began speaking this desire into the Universe.  Then an amazing opportunity arrived and we found ourselves having to make one of the most important choices of our lifetime… “are we going to move our children and us back to Iceland and replant our roots there?”  The answer was, at first a small, but then a strong YES and once we made the decision, the Universe seemed to conspire to make it happen and we found ourselves in Iceland before we could even find the time to slightly doubt our choice.  Which I am glad to say we haven’t done.   Yet, the transition hasn’t been all too easy, but then again, it has been easy enough.  The last month has been very busy for us, settling in and focusing on the basics of everyday life; getting acquainted with a new job, new place to live, new schools for the children and then looking for a car and a home to live in on a more permanent basis.  Our ‘things’ are not here yet as they are still slowly sailing across the ocean yet there is absolutely nothing missing in our lives.  We have each other and get to experience this life change together.

I guess the big lesson for me was to simply ‘let go’ and ‘allow’.  What was meant to be was already meant to BE.  As soon as I was able to let go of old, and perhaps outdated dreams and make room for new ones, everything seemed to just flow.

I can thank my coach and mentor for helping me out with the little resistance I was feeling.  He also helped me re-appreciate what I do for a living and see how amazing it is to have a coach to push and pull you forward, even when you want to stand still and resist all changes.  I leave you with the following words that were written by this amazing man, Richard Seaman;

“You can choose to go, be, and have… and in the end you’ll exclaim, shocked and bewildered, that because of all the synchronicities of your life, all the “clicks” and “coincidences”, and the many happy “accidents,” your bounty and good fortune must have been your destiny”.

So here’s my story…

After 12 years in the beautiful Arizona desert I have moved back ‘home’ to Iceland. It is the place I’ve always called ‘home’ even though my house and home have been in Arizona for a large chunk of my adult life. Arizona is the place in which I went to school and received my bachelors and masters degrees, started my companies, had my children, made some of my greatest friends and in any way possible, ‘found’ myself and discovered who I really am.

After 12 years, Arizona had become a ‘home’ to me and it was a place in which I was in my ‘comfort zone’ and I knew pretty well what my days would bring. I have a great job in Arizona as a coach and amazing, wonderful clients and it was a bit surreal to one day have to plug myself out of that ‘reality’ and plug into a new one.

There’s been A LOT going on in my life these past few weeks so I haven’t been posting much. It all started with my husband being approached and asked if he was interested in exploring a job opportunity in Iceland. We didn’t see ourselves moving back just yet but we had said to each other (and to the Universe) that we were open to ‘change’ and open to a new adventure. I guess you have to be careful what you wish for:) Then, sort of like out of the blue this Iceland job comes up and he was very interested in the job itself and said Yes to exploring it, thinking one shouldn’t exclude anything and it was good to look into opportunities for we could always say No if we ended up not being interested.

To make a long story short, he was offered the job and felt he simply had to accept it for it was something he really wanted to do, and of course I wanted him to follow his heart. So, as soon as the decision was made, we packed up our whole ‘lives’ in just a few weeks, sold many of our belongings and loaded the rest into a container and boarded a one-way flight to Iceland!

We just landed here yesterday and for me this whole thing is still so odd for I sort of feel like I’m here for a little visit, just like I used to. The fact that I’m here to stay is still pretty darn weird to grasp! Iceland has changed a lot in the past 12 years and everything feels different yet in a way, still the same and so familiar.

I’m pretty excited about this adventure that we’re in for and can’t wait to re-experience my amazing home country through my children’s eyes who are both born in Arizona and have only been here to visit. For them this is a BIG change for they are literally leaving ‘Life’ – as they know it! They are saying goodbye to the house they were brought up in, and to their school, their teachers and school-buddies and to our ‘chosen family’ and to all of the friends they’ve grown up with.

I realize that all of this looks different through their eyes and I’ve tried to really prepare them for this by keeping them as aware and involved in the process as possible, at least for little kids to comprehend. I am still amazed at how calm and non-chalant they’ve been about this whole thing. It’s like they somehow ‘know’ that this is mean to be. My daughter who’s 7 has shed a few tears for the friends she’ll miss and for the cat we left behind with friends of ours but she’s been quick to sort of ‘deal’ with everything and has been great about focusing on the ‘positives’ of this move which to her are grandma, grandpa and all the cousins but mostly this; “In Iceland, I can walk to school by myself, go to the store and to a play-park by myself and play outside all the time!” (She’s a very independent little person:))

So, here we are, in the country of the ever-changing light, and while everyone is fast asleep at 3am in the morning, I’m up again and wide-awake for my body is like “excuse me, woman, it’s 8pm in the evening and you just had a nice, long nap but shouldn’t be sleeping for the night just yet”.

We’re staying with my mother for a few days until the furnished place we rented becomes available and then we’ll start looking for a more permanent living arrangement as our ‘home’ makes it’s trip across the US and then sails across the ocean to meet us here in Iceland in a few weeks.

As ‘normal’ and familiar as this country is to me, there is nothing ‘normal’ and familiar about our lives right now. It’s a little odd being in ‘The Gap’ yet I’m excited to learn what the future holds. We were meant to come back ‘home’. I don’t really believe in coincidences and this whole process has been amazingly fast and quick and also so smooth, and easy that it feels like it’s somehow ‘led and guided’. All we had to do was say YES to ‘change’ and to new opportunities and here we are! We’re the same people we were yesterday but now in a completely different location on the planet. Everything is different yet everything’s the same….for wherever you go… there YOU are!

To some people, BE-ing comes easy. They simply know who they are and aren’t afraid to express it and BE it!  To the rest of us, “who I am at the ‘core of my being’” is something we seek, and explore, and eventually discover or grow into later on in life.  Then again, some of us never come out of our shells.  Some will spend so much time and attention on BE-ing who we ‘think’ we’re supposed to BE that we don’t make time to give who we ‘really’ are any specific thought or attention.

Every single one of us has been raised with some ‘conditioning’ and we learn how to act and ‘behave’, and how to ‘stay out of trouble’ and ‘get approval’.  Then as the years pass and we mature and grow into our independence we may choose to search and discover our ‘true’ identity?  Doesn’t everyone want to simply BE who we really are, and long for the strength and courage to effortlessly BE that, whatever that may BE?  I wonder…

Whether we give our ‘identity’ much conscious thought or not, I wouldn’t be surprised if most of us see ourselves quite differently from the way we’re perceived by others? Perhaps you’re the extrovert in your ‘clan’ but as much as there is the social, outspoken side to you there’s also the quiet, reflective persona that many, if not most, never get the honor of meeting. Maybe it is the other way around and you’re the quiet, humble and somewhat mysterious one on the outside, but within you dwells a dynamic performer longing to shine through ever so brightly.

Who are you really? And why are you here? And why in this specific point in time? If you could’ve chosen any other time in history, and chosen any other family, town and country to belong to, why would you have picked NOW as your time to show up and BE here? What is this all about? What are you here to do or who are you here to BE?

These types of questions have always been roaming around in my head (and soul).  A part of me was always quiet and observant, taking note of the life outside of me, noticing everyone else’s life stories while I was somewhat disconnected with my own.  In a way I didn’t feel like I truly belonged in my family, or in the neighborhoods we lived in or in the schools I went to, or even in the country I was born in.  I remember this lonely feeling of not ‘fitting in’ and almost feeling as if I’d been misplaced.  I didn’t get it.  I felt ‘weird’.  There had to be something ‘wrong’ with ME.  I loved my family, and loved my friends, neighbors and fellow countrymen but I absolutely felt like the ‘odd one out’.

Interestingly enough, I’ve learned to love being the ‘odd one out’ because that simply means that I’m BE-ing ME!  And, guess what!?  Every single one of us is unique and different.  I’ve had the pleasure and honor of meeting so many people, from all over the world who’ve talked about this same exact feeling of ‘not fitting in’ and being the ‘odd one out’.  I guess we’re all much more alike than we think we are:)

What if being ‘odd’ was the norm?  When are we going to fully embrace and nurture our amazing differences?  Life definitely wouldn’t be as interesting if we didn’t have all these different colors to observe and enjoy.  Even though our paths are different we’re all headed the same way.  We’re here to grow and evolve, and shine as brightly as we can while we’re here.  So here’s to BE-ing YOU!  Go out there and bravely BE the ‘odd one out’ and put YOUR colorful mark on the world!

Related Post: “Here’s to the “crazy” ones…”

Essentially, everything we do is a function of our confidence in ourselves. Every single action and aspect of our lives has to be practiced and learned. From the moment we are born we build our confidence one step at a time and learn to master everything we need to know. We take chances, we put ourselves out there, we try new things and we learn to walk and talk, ride a bike, read, drive a car, connect and communicate with people, and improve and master our jobs, careers and relationships.

There are always moments in our lives where we feel uncertain and unsure about our abilities to do and learn new things, even though we’ve learned, changed and evolved many times before, over and over again. But, without taking chances, and even signing up for a few guaranteed falls and bruises, a human being wouldn’t learn to walk in the first place. We are made to be braver than we realize and stronger than we often dare to imagine, yet as we get older we sometimes forget how powerful we really are and we let ourselves believe we are small and weak instead of big and brave. We tell ourselves it’s better to ‘play it safe’, yet when we choose to stay in our ‘bubble of protection’ we tend to struggle so much more than we would if we’d simply let it burst! Staying in our bubble keeps us attached to our fears and doubts, and repeatedly circulating with them instead of embracing positive change and evolution.

The only thing that can essentially hold us back in life are limiting, self-defeating fears and doubts. Holding onto doubts and fears such as; What will people think? What will they say? What if they don’t like me? What if they don’t approve of me? What if they don’t love me? What if I can’t do it? What if I’m no good at it? What if I’m not good enough? What if I do it wrong? What if, what if, what if…. Holding onto these fears and doubts will rob us of our lives.

I am sure you know these types of thoughts… they’ve popped up for everyone but the questions we might want to ask ourselves instead could be something like these; What if I’d always listen to these self-defeating thoughts and missed out on the fullness and richness of my life? What if I let my fears and doubts rob me of the LOVE and happiness that I am meant to live and feel? What if I am perfectly OK to be just the way I am? What if I have all this amazing Greatness in me but never let it shine? What if I die with my ‘music’ still in me?

Would it be worth it? Would ‘playing it safe’ be worth missing out on life and missing out on love, peace and happiness?

What would happen if we could choose to see limiting perceptions as untrue perceptions? What if you could choose to disconnect yourself from fears and be FREE from perceived limitations? What if you simply didn’t listen to doubts and fears and decided not to care so much about other people’s actions and reactions? What would that feel like?

What if how we react to other people is essentially a choice? What if who we are in the world is a choice we make? How different would that feel from the way you’re feeling today? Is it possible that you would feel happier, healthier, more joyful, peaceful and loving?

I write these words for I have been there, I know the confining world of fear and doubt all too well. I learned to be fearful, and I learned to hide my true self. I learned to please others and I learned to be a good girl and not to draw too much attention to myself. For years, I played it safe, I didn’t speak up, I didn’t express my ideas, I hid who I really was, how I really felt and what I was really thinking and dreaming about. I hid because I couldn’t stand the mere thought of being judged. I was afraid of being different, afraid of being unique, and feared being seen as stupid or silly or not really that smart and creative. So I decided to not let any of it show, and just keep my thoughts and ideas to myself because being open about my truest Self felt like utter madness! I felt different from everybody else. I didn’t know anyone who was expressing thoughts and feelings like mine. I didn’t feel I fitted in with anyone. Being that I was raised in a humble, working class family, dreaming BIG somehow made me feel guilty and shameful. Who was I to want to do all these things with my life? Who was I to not be content with what I had and knew?

Except, something in me kept calling out to me and I longed for the confidence to simply be who I was. So, I kept pushing myself to learn and study. Every now and again, when I felt comfortable around people I’d peak out from under my shell to test if it was safe. Over and over I made small but incremental steps and changes in my life and in my communication with people and slowly but surely I grew bigger and bolder and learned to let go of many of these limiting fears. I realized that nobody cared as much about what was ‘weird’ about me as I did. Nobody really paid as much attention to me as I did. The truth is that nobody really even noticed that I was changing and evolving because everyone else was busy dealing with their own lives and their own fears, doubts and insecurities. Whenever I’d start feeling somewhat comfortable in what I was doing, I would add something new to explore, and take on a new challenge and I continually expanded my comfort zone. For me, pushing myself has become a habit; I do it everyday. To be REAL has become a way of being in the world and being small and insecure isn’t real. If I start getting too comfortable, I know I am not growing as much as I can. We are all meant to grow and evolve and open up to simply be the fabulous Being we often refer to as I or ME. Our life’s mission is to fully become who we really are. If I can do it, so can YOU, and anyone else for that matter. I am no different than anyone else; no more special or more skilled than anyone else in the world and still I am no less.

The world is filled with love and magic for us to capture and embrace so what are we all so afraid of? The following quote by Marianne Williamson is one of my absolute favorites and it keeps inspiring me to push myself further in my life and being, and to also gently and lovingly push the people I serve, for every single one of us has light within us that is meant to shine brightly.

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, ‘Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and fabulous?” Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that people won’t feel insecure around you. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It’s not just in some of us; it’s in all of us. And when we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”

The REAL ME is not small and insecure or afraid and doubtful. The REAL ME is open and loving, kind and compassionate, flexible and brave, and immensely creative and bold! Who is the REAL YOU?

This morning, I woke up to two little cuddle bugs resting their warm, little heads on my shoulders. They’d snuck into my bed in the early hours of the morning right after their dad had left for work. After embracing them and this beautiful moment for awhile, and giving them lots of hugs and kisses I told my daughter we had to hurry on out of bed so we’d get ready for school in time. “Just five more minutes mom…” she pleaded and pulled the covers up to our shoulders.  In my mind I quickly calculated the “opportunity cost” and realized that giving into her plead would very likely make us late for school as we were already running a bit behind… yet it was an easy sell.

Some of my favorite moments of being a mom is waking up exactly like this and getting to be this close to my children. It isn’t every day that I have both of them by me, feeling calm and relaxed at the exact same time, and still resting in the peaceful haziness of a good night’s sleep. There is something magical about being all snuggled up close under the same big cover. It feels safe and comforting, and so genuinely loving. It is almost as if nothing else exists; we are in our own little world.

Suddenly, our cat decided to jump on the bed to join the party and in that same instant, seemingly out of the blue, my little three-year-old gets up and roars as loud as he can imitating a dinosaur. Our cat, in absolute astonishment goes flying up into the air and does an astounding backwards flip before it lands on the floor. We all broke out laughing and then my little three year old joker reenacted the entire scene about three times to his sister’s pure joy and delight. Five minutes turned into fifteen and as hard as it was to step out of this magic, Ms. Logical Mom showed up and made sure we’d get going. And, so we went, off to seize a new day, a good 20 minutes late, yet feeling so happy and joyous, and still laughing about our cat’s acrobatic talents.

As I rest in the joyous memory of that beautiful morning I can’t help but realize how easy it would have been to miss out on that magical moment. Everything that brings love, joy and happiness into my life was right there in front of me. All I had to do was say YES to IT.

IT… is LIFE in a nutshell. The actual core of IT, the magic of your life that often comes at no cost at all yet brings you invaluable joy and happiness. We all want IT but we all too often tend to be too busy to get to IT.

If I had chosen to let my responsible EGO win this one, it would have been all too eager to get going and get out the door. It would have said to itself ‘we can’t be late’ and ‘we’ve got important things to do’! Drill sergeant mommy might have shown up to make sure we’d get there in time, “let’s go, let’s go, let’s go, we gotta hurry!”

I hear so many of my clients with young children talk about the chaos and hassle of getting out the door in the morning. We usually end up discussing preemptive strategies and preplanning efforts that will decrease the stress and effort of getting out the door. Yet the most important lesson they, and I, have learned is the simple art of “letting it go!” The more at ease and the more relaxed we are about the morning routine the easier it is and the smoother the whole thing flows. Instead of battling it, forcing it, and trying to control every aspect of it, they let IT win and by letting IT win they no longer fight it, but get to enjoy IT!  And, amazingly, the kids seem to somehow flow out the door in time.

I have many clients come to me that feel they don’t have any time left over for their own LIFE!   They are stuck in the cycle of having too much to do and get done, and there are always places to get to. In the meantime, their LIFE is right there in front of them, patiently waiting for them to choose to be present to it, but instead they keep running as fast as they can, far away from it, convincing themselves that they’ll get to IT later.

Why not let IT win? When IT wins, YOU win!

How much joy, peace and happiness is passing you by every single day because you are not letting IT win?   The IT you keep chasing is right there in front of you.  Go seize the moment, and capture IT!

As I woke up to greet my Morning of Health and Healing I was excited about the prospect of inner calm and centeredness. But, something else lured in the air and I had within me some sort of an odd mix of restlessness, boredom, curiosity and excitement.

While I sat in my car waiting for my yoga class to start my iPhone caught my attention and instead of reading the ever so centered and spiritually healing literature that I had brought with me to read before class (Louise Hay’s, You Can Heal Your Life), I ended up browsing the world news and checking out celebrity gossip, which is something I usually stay away from.

When my yoga class started I was far from being calm and centered but instead had a mind scattered with mundane tasks along with an overwhelm of information and images ranging from Haiti’s earthquake victims to the images of America’s ‘privileged, and rich and famous’. When our teacher had us do a ‘vibration dance’ to shake out our stagnant energy and empty our minds, an image of Heidi Montag’s newly, cosmetically altered face and body popped up in my mind. Why was she (of all people!) showing up for MY moment to graciously calm and heal my mind and body?

I quickly got to work on evicting her from my mind but the image prevailed, along with various thoughts and feelings about the complexities of our world… the superficiality, greed, and ego-centeredness displayed in popular culture along with the hope, love and compassion demonstrated towards the people in Haiti. At the same time the yoga instructor is calling out to us over a loud drumbeat sound; “empty your minds, empty your minds…” and there I am, frantically shaking my body with all my might, desperately trying to shake these images out of my mind.

After the yoga session, I head to the massage studio, eager to experience the concluding part of my Morning of Health and Healing. I show up far too early and sit down with some tea and the book I brought with me. Ahh… this will be good! But, yet again, instead of reading the book I end up allowing my scattered mind to take over and before I know it I am checking out Twitterville and reading other people’s blog postings.

Then Daniel shows up and tells me he is ready for me. The stones have warmed up and he ask what I want to focus on today, and then leaves me to get ready. I lay there thinking THIS will do the trick! A massage with Daniel is bound to leave me calm and centered, and pretty much comatized. He starts laying the stones on top of me and my body sinks into the massage table, ready to receive this healing. He starts stroking me all over my back and then I feel his hands sort of sensually gliding down to my buttocks, and his intensely firm and “I am in-control” movements take my head into yet another spin. Except this time it is of a much naughtier nature.

As my mind starts drifting off with notions of physical pleasure my ego decides to pop up real quick to ruin the moment, saying; “You should have put on some mascara on or at least some lipgloss before you showed up, I mean, my God woman! You look so utterly NAKED!”…

“Stop this right now!” my ego then calls out. “Jeez, what is wrong with you today!?” I irritatingly ask my ego self, half expecting this scolding to turn my head off for good but instead this absolutely calm and loving answer appears out of ‘nowhere’ asking right back; “Wrong?… Why does something have to be “wrong” with you? You’re just being YOU! You are just being in your imaginative and creative mind and enjoying your body. There is absolutely nothing wrong with that! … Even the parts of you that you sometimes try to change, deny or suppress are lovable… All of this is YOU! Why not enjoy it… it just means you’re ALIVE! You’re joyously HERE, in the NOW, experiencing your human body and your human mind… that’s all!”

So I relaxed enough to simply enjoy my moment without making any more judgments of myself. And, it felt SO good!

I believe you can LOVE every single part there is of YOU. There is no “bad” except for what you believe to be “bad”…

Wow! I was amazed and quickly sunk back into the massage table allowing myself to flow with everything I was experiencing. Everything is in essence GOOD, including ones desire for the world to be different and ones desire to change and BE better as a BEING.

Today I forgave myself for not being “perfect” in my minds eye and I chose to graciously love myself and all my human complexities. Everything is GOOD… including my enjoyment of physical touch and pleasure…

Man, will my husband be happy to see how happy I’ll be to see him tonight:)

Our 2009 holiday break was absolutely wonderful. I enjoyed relaxing and reading, cooking and playing, and spending time with my precious husband and kids. My husband and I went on a few dates and reconnected yet again after several busy months in both of our careers, and all of us went on a family vacation together where we played in the snow and had an amazing time. We also met and dined with several good friends and in short, everything was all around awesome! So awesome in fact, that I’ve been having a hard time getting back into the groove of things. Taking it easy and reconnecting with family and friends, and with my own spirit has been so calming and soothing that I haven’t had the slightest urge to start ‘rushing’ into the year 2010. I was actually quite amazed at all the ‘business’ emails I received on January 1st!

Despite my inner serenity I am very excited about this year. I find it so fantastic and futuristic to get to be alive in the year twenty-ten! I’m here, NOW in 2010, watching a paradigm shift unfold before my eyes, as I and all of us are growing and evolving as spiritual beings on our human journeys. It’s all pretty darn exciting!

One of the books I read over the holiday break is a book by Cheryl Richardson called, The Art of Extreme Self-Care. I picked it out for a client, sensing it was somehow ‘the ideal’ book for that person but decided I would read it first before handing it over. As it often is with these seemingly ‘random’ things I ended up learning quite a bit about myself in the process, and am excited to get to share this simple and straightforward book with others.

The book helped me ‘get over’ any guilt I may have had about putting ME first and my personal goal or ‘resolution’ for this year is to take GOOD care of ME and hold onto this sense of serenity and balance and focus much of my attention on Health and Healing.

One of my favorite things from Cheryl’s book is The Absolute NO List, and I had fun coming up with my own Absolute NO List for 2010… and on.

Here are some examples from My Absolute NO List;

I will NO longer…

1. Live without pets. We just adopted a beautiful yellow kitty from the Humane Society called Mimi Freyja and my heart has already grown a size… or two☺
2. RUSH… I will let things come to me and believe in and trust Divine Timing.
3. Eat what is not AT LEAST 80% GOOD for me.
4. Take business phone calls when I am with my children.
5. NOT ask for help when I need it.

So there, here’s how I am entering into the year 2010; centered, calm, and serene and determined to keep it that way☺ I am starting a new list tomorrow, called My Absolute YES List…

So what are some of your Absolute NO’s and/or Absolute YES’s for 2010?

Many years ago when I was a quiet and reserved girl in college, my girlfriend suggested we’d sign up for the theater together. Something in me ‘lit up” by that suggestion and as outrageous as that felt for someone who was as terrified of judgment as I was at the time, I simply knew I had to do it. It is amazing how your spirit has a way of guiding you in the right direction.

Our director was wonderful; a young and enthusiastic actor who showed up with passion and power for two whole semesters and picked out a challenging play for us to perform; Shakespeare’s Midsummer’s Night Dream.

On one of our first nights with him he used a common phrase; “you just have to fake it till you make it”. Man, did that one simple line resonate with me or what!? It pretty much became a mantra of mine for the next few years. I was definitely not comfortable with being in the “spotlight” in any way and feared even the “thought” of people judging me. Yet, that night I had a major light-bulb moment in realizing that nobody else actually knew this about me, meaning I could simply “act” as if being on stage and acting came easy to me. It sounded so simple, really. All I had to do was fake it!

I must admit that I did not show any remarkable acting skills playing Queen Titania, as I had a hard time stepping out of my self-consciousness, but the experience helped the ‘Real Me’ peak out of her shell a little bit even though only for a few seconds at a time. My choice to sign up for the school’s theater was definitely instrumental in my life and taught me new things about myself, such as that there were things I could do that I might think I couldn’t do. Whenever we step out of our comfort zones we tend to surprise ourselves with our own strength and courage which helps us gain more confidence for future challenges.

Later, I even jumped on the opportunity to participate in beauty pageants which felt somewhat “wrong” and outrageous at the time, and still later I decided to take some classes in public speaking to get more comfortable with speaking in front of people.

The girl that once clung on to her own few friends at parties and usually kept her head down to avoid having to make eye-contact, often counting the lines in the pavement, had surely faked her way towards appearing somewhat at ease in front of groups of people. Who would have thought she could do that?! Yet, nobody really knew that this wasn’t at all that easy for me. It is not as if I ever acted as if it was all that hard. I sort of kept that part to myself because in a way I was embarrassed for not having more confidence and for having so much self-doubt and fear in me.

The good thing is that I ended up being so good at faking it that eventually I fooled even myself and developed a new persona. In a way, faking it had caused me to make it! I really had become more comfortable with being in front of people; I was actually able to talk to groups of them and present my designs and my thoughts and ideas fully knowing I would get responses and even judgments, and that I might have to defend (or at least clarify) my creations and my perspective.

So, even though I purposely “force” myself to practice the art of simply being myself and I preach that same message to others, a part of me will always be the insecure little girl that once lived in a subsidized housing complex, and was embarrassed about who she was and where she came from. But, that part of me is the “old me”. The “old me” was brave enough to fake her way to become “the new me”, a designer, business consultant, life coach, writer and blogger, openly sharing intimate details about herself with no specific fear or remorse.

One day, I hope the “new me” will have become the “old me” as I will have taken even more steps towards being the absolute Real Me.

Perhaps the next time YOU hear that “old you” saying things such as; you can’t do something, or that you’re too shy, or not good enough, or don’t know how, or are too afraid, and what would people think?!, and so on and so forth, why not just disregard that voice altogether and choose to fake your way towards creating a “new you”? One who in essence is the “Real YOU”, who’s just waiting for you to finally let YOU come out and play! It may not be easy at first; it may feel unreal, and even forced, and scary but know that with commitment, practice and repetition you are destined to get to where it is you want to go. All you have to do is let go of your fears. You may at first have to completely fake your way towards fearlessness, but rest assured in knowing that by faking it you are destined to make it!

As a service professional I found it interesting to discover that aside from necessities (home, car and monthly groceries) most of our lucid financial output goes towards other service industries. I definitely would not want it any other way since I had been disheartened by mass consumption for too many years. To actually get to be alive and personally witness the ‘over-consumption era’ slowly dwindling down is pure bliss for me.

I wonder why people are so afraid of the “current” economy? I was literally terrified of the “old” economy, the one we lived in in the year 2007, which is not that long ago.

The inevitable outcome of our mass consuming ways would surely be the utter completion of our natural resources, and if it had not been for this ‘economic transformation’ perhaps little else could have stopped the shopaholics in their tracks. In 2007, we were actually headed for disaster faster than we could have imagined. Observing the never-ending glorification of the lifestyles of the rich and famous and seeing so many poor souls aiming for that same ‘ideal’ felt like watching a train wreck in the making. I dreamed of the ability of being able to slow down time so awakened humans could actually stand a chance of being able to come up with some sort of a plan. I guess the Universe has a way of taking care of itself and a house of cards, built on ignorance and greed is sure to come tumbling down eventually.

It is not too far fetched to imagine that the international financial recession is the greatest blessing our future generations could have been given. It was critical that the mass-consumption ideology would hit a major roadblock and for us, ‘the eternal dreamers’ who are out to change the world, to be given a platform from which to come up with a plan for creating a fresher, more sustainable world order. Rome wasn’t built in a day and we have a long road ahead of us but the fact is that “the journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step”.

Happiness can not be found inside of a handbag, shoes or designer jeans… although I do admit that many of those man-created things of beauty do have their unique appeal:)… Still, who needs to have 10 pairs of jeans or designer bags, let alone 20 or, 40 or 100!? Does anyone get that?! I’d love for someone to explain that to me.

Contrary to what we all have been seeing on TV for years and years, happiness is not about getting and having stuff! You can NOT find it by acquiring more and more pointless and eventually useless junk! Yet, this is what the entire western world was lead to believe by large scale corporations and their ingenious marketers.

Capitalism in its old and traditional form is dead! It will never again be as it once was. Our future transactions will more likely be about investing in each other’s services than investing in meaningless, and inevitably deteriorating, materialistic things, and hence depleting our planet of its beauty and splendor. Now, isn’t that awesome?! Hallelujah anyone? I mean, who wants their life to be about materialism and consumption anyway? Isn’t there much more to it than that?! And, isn’t it time we all found out!?

Now, I must say, that a certain level of happiness can be found by using money as the positive and creative energy it can be. Immense happiness can be found by making a difference in the world, by supporting a good cause, by giving to others, strangers, family and friends, and giving to yourself when you take care of you, body, mind and spirit and do what you love doing. And, once again, for the record, taking care of you is NOT about buying you some more stuff!

How you use money affects the world we live in, and creates the world our children will inherit. Money is energy and POWER so set your priorities straight and get conscious with what you are actually creating each and every time you choose to make a transaction. You truly hold the power to shape and change the world.

Every transaction you make has an impact. What kind of an impact are you making? How are YOU using your money? What would you like to do with the creative power it holds? If every transaction you make helps shape the world you live in… what kind of a world are you creating?

YOU are, and always will be a POWERFUL CREATOR of YOUR REALITY!

Go and get creative with your money!!!

You might say that I have been in a bit of a funk lately… I have not been feeling very inspired as for what to write about. A writer’s block sounds odd to someone like me, who usually has a harder time shutting my brain off and my mouth up!

Then it hit me… stop waiting around for inspiration to hit you and just friggin’ START!

So here it is… a little experiment on this START-ing theory since at this starting point, I only have the vaguest idea of what it is that I am meant to share today…

I wonder how many things people put off because they are just not “feeling it” at the moment or feeling they do not yet have what it takes to get something done. How much time and effort is spent on gathering resources, doing research, reading books, and searching for inspiration and motivation when all that is really required is the simple effort of beginning?

“A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step”… the only real effort towards propelling yourself forward in life and in creating anything really, whatever that may be… is choosing to hit your own START button!

Who cares if you do not exactly know where you are going? Who cares if you do not have the perfect roadmap, the exact plan, a thorough outline, or the final blueprint? Even the perfect plan was imperfect in the beginning, starting with a single line or a sentence; perhaps a statement of a dream!

I have learned that all successful people have one thing in common; they value active CREATION over active imagination… So they do not just sit around and think things over and over… they actually act on their ideas! Even when they have no idea on how to actually get something finished. If you do not start somewhere, you are essentially going nowhere… Sometimes it is just about starting, letting go and trusting your inner roadmap.

Within all of us lies the roadmap that takes us to our dreams. My dream life is pretty much the life I am living, coaching a few clients at a time, helping them (and me) grow and evolve in life, then spending the rest of my time loving and nurturing my beautiful family and doing what I love doing, one being the act of writing. Now, this is what we can call a statement of my dream life! But, in order to live that dream life I can’t spend my days thinking it over and over, waiting for inspiration to hit me… I have to actually create it… just start and trust that I will find my way because what I am seeking is already seeking me…

Is there anything that YOU want to create in your life that you are not creating as of now? Are there topics and things you keep exploring, researching, and gathering resources for but have yet to do and take into ACTION mode? Perhaps it is time for YOU to take out that pen and paper and see what comes out when you allow your body to be a tool for your higher self. What occurs when you express your true self’s desires… What answers show up to the questions: What do I want to CREATE in life? And, What is my dream life?

Your inner roadmap is in place, you were born with it, and the only time you truly feel lost is when you are simply not moving at all!

To find the inspiration to truly move forwards; start dreaming!

When your dream is clear to you it can be quite easy to hit that START-button even though you still may not know all the How To’s. Just take that first step and… go for it!

“Whatever you can do, or dream you can, begin it. Boldness has genius, power and magic in it.” ~ Goethe

And, herein, ends this experiment on what it is like to hit the START button without having a set plan in place… and LOOK!! I just completed a posting:)